The Enemy and the Inner Me

I.
If I had the guts to tell You how I feel I would say I gotta stay cause heaven holds no earthly resolution for me.  The untainted can't heal the hurt that dwells within--
bound to this sinful flesh, are regrets bigger than me;
thoughts that have shaped me--
actions, senseless, they birthed me and mold my being while God seeps through the cracked character of my broken spirit;
heaven can't fix this me...

II.
I know it's just a feeling, but those are real--valid, right?
Even if only for a moment, these weightless and unsubstantial intangibilities are so heavy;
They bind me--
Me and my happy...

III.
Eternity--in glory at that,
should bring me peace of mind
but I feel empty
I feel worn and disgusted with myself
for allowing humanity,
to get the best of me...

Unworthy (a circle poem)

dirty
dingy
naked
naughty
beautiful
basking
heat
hell
cool
cold
lukewarm
love
God
good
damned
deranged
nonchalant
noteworthy
biting
remarks
red
scars
salvation
fearing
unknown
makes
me
feel
alone
and...